Good morning, G.O. readers!
I’m sitting here at my desk at work. I hung up with my husband about 15 minutes ago, and I found myself feeling a familiar emptiness. I always call to let him know that I’ve made it safely inside the building, but sometimes when I’m on the phone, I feel like I don’t want to hang up. I feel as though I want him to stay on with me and not leave me alone to have to face my workday by myself; or I may feel like I want him to tell me some “magical” words that will make everything okay. I, many times feel like I want him to be my hero. I want him to save me from what I feel I can’t save myself from. Do you ever feel like this? Do you ever wish that a family member, friend, or even the mailman could save you from certain situations that you find fearful or hard to deal with in life?
My husband isn’t the only person I can feel this way toward. Sometimes it can be a friend. Sometimes I can email or text a buddy, frantically seeking some words of encouragement or solace that would make the world seem a little more manageable or acceptable. I often want my supervisors to “just not make things so complicated” and just to leave me the hell alone once in awhile, and to stop “making up stupid shit for us to have to do”, in attempt to ease the dissatisfaction I feel all too often.
All of this likely started when I was a child. My first hero was my mom. As a kid, you are supposed to feel protected by your parents; but when you are very shy, (as I was), you can feel lost when you have to step out into the world on your own and everything and everyone can look scary and menacing.
I suppose the real challenge in life, is learning to be your own hero; because ultimately, your spouse, your friends, your co-workers, or strangers on the street, can’t truly fix whatever is wrong in your life. They can offer assistance and provide support, but the real work always has to be done by you. Outside of ourselves, there is only God who can help us heal and move forward in our lives in a positive way. We all can have sidekicks on our journey to help us out, (and I believe most of us do), but alas, no one other than ourselves can ever truly be the hero of our personal journey. There is no individual who truly comes along and saves us. Could they be sent to help us? Yes. Could they point us in the right direction or give us clues? Certainly. But if we want true change in our lives, it is up to us, (with loads of divine assistance), to enact it ourselves.
This entry was so not planned; but it just poured out of me–so I had to write it. Hope this can be a blessing for someone out there reading this. Okay, let me go now, so that I can take my own advice and be the hero of this day–for myself.
